Thursday, June 16, 2011

Weiner's constituents need therapy

Nowadays nearly every celebrity or politician who scandalizes himself eventually retreats to 'therapy' to remedy his proclivity for self-demolition. I suspect that even Arnold will do a few more bench presses in the gym as an act of contrition.

Congressman Anthony Weiner is apparently entering therapy:


I wish him (and his wife and his child) the best.

But too often missed is the pressing need for therapy for the (quite dysfunctional) people who produced Congressman Weiner-- Weiner's benighted constituents in New York's 9th Congressional District in Queens.

The dysfunctional voters of NY-9 have previously given us Rep. Charles Schumer, emphasizing the chronicity and repetitive nature of the illness.

Intensive therapy for the 69,439 voters who sent Weiner, the sexting, big-spending, abortion-loving, unaffordable-unconstitutional Health Care Act hawking, staff-alienating, parking ticket avoiding, left-wing hack to Washington would undoubtedly be expensive, but goodness knows it's needed. Health care for all, as they say.

I envision a particularly effective therapeutic approach. After a thorough physical and mental evaluation, each voter is led into a mock voting booth with a lever marked "Left-wing jerk". The compulsive liberal voter will of course immediately press the lever, which would immediately cause a picture of Weiner's Fruit-of-the-Looms to be sexted to the voter's blackberry.

Aversion therapy. Could be very effective.


  1. Actually, that's kinda hot. I really like how you put such attention to detail in the description, with a bit of homoerotic flair. Keep it up, and you can go places with your writing.

  2. hehe, yeah, I think your aversion therapy might backfire for a lot of people. Have you seen those pics? Weiner is ripped.

  3. Ohhhhhhh. I get to pull the lever and see penises!?!? Perhaps when I pull the lever for the right winger I can see a picture of a bloody Jesus on the cross. Such choices... how will I decide?